Same Experience – with Experience
When you are young you have inexperience, society’s expectations, and ourselves (the demons that live in our heads) pushing us along and l helping you make decisions.
As an adult, re-experiencing situations that you’ve reflected back on over the years is ….. interesting to say the least. Maybe someone jarring when you realize it too.
Taking a step back from the moment your in, to realize….. “Shit, this is just like that time…….. xyz” A Reminder of how it felt then, and comparing it to how it currently felt.
It was like this moment of weird ‘feelings’ time warp.
I remembered what made me feel uncomfortable then and if it made me uncomfortable now. I remembered what I wished I could have done, or how I wish I could have acted, stood up for myself, or not been hypersensitive to.
It was great to feel more in control of my life. It was AMAZING to be surrounded with people who I didn’t feel would leave me ‘unsafe’ to continue to party. And Unbelievable to know that my partner was looking out for me and that I can trust him completely.
If I could talk to young me:
- Don’t do anything you are not comfortable with. EVER… Regardless if a family member/adult etc says its okay.
- If you have to make excuses to ‘not’ see someone, consider why. Friends should lift you up, not zap your energy.
- Family is no different than strangers. You just spend more time with them. You aren’t required to be there for them anymore than they are for you. The same applies to other people in your life.
- NEVER give more than you are willing to lose. You will never lose a friend this way when they aren’t able to pay you back.
- If you don’t ‘VIBE’ with someone, it’s okay. Don’t go anywhere alone with them and you CAN opt to hang out if they are going to be around.
- If anyone says that you are being a prude, over reacting, being a bitch for laying out boundaries to keep yourself and your mental health safe…. They either want to learn and grow in understanding or… are not your friends.
- Name Drop a few people to stay the hell away from.
- Don’t take french classes just to be different from your family… Spanish will be much more useful – stick with those classes.